Those are the words of Dr. Hank Weisinger co-author of the book Performing Under Pressure. On his blog, he writes about dealing with pressure by dealing with criticism.
When receiving criticism, we experience emotion. Emotions such as:
- feeling hurt
- anger
- dejection
- disappointment
- resentfulness
These and other emotions are natural. But, if we’re good at evaluating our emotions we will be better at dealing with the pressure.
Dr. Weisinger suggests 4 steps to deal with criticism more productively.
Increase your receptivity to criticism
You can’t use criticism to your advantage if you are not going to at least listen to it. Align your definition of criticism with its historical helpful intent by programming yourself with the thought “criticism is information that can help me grow.” The more you internalize this thought, the less likely you will respond to criticism with defensiveness, anger, and hurt.
Appraise the criticism
Being receptive to criticism gives you the opportunity to evaluate what you are being told and to decide whether it is in your best interest to act upon it. High performers use multiple criteria to help them decide:
- How important is the information to my life/job?
- Is the source of the criticism credible?
- Do other people agree with the criticism?
- How much effort is required to respond productively?
- What are the benefits to me?
The real value in appraising the criticism using these criteria is that it slows down your response and minimizes the chances that you will dismiss criticism impulsively when it fact, it could be very helpful.
Acknowledge your appraisal
High performers show respect and appreciation to their critics by sharing how they evaluated the criticism provided. This often leads to a productive exchange of viewpoints, and often in the case of high performers, new insights are gleaned that lead him or her to agree with their critic.
Take action
What if the criticism is valid —it’s in your best interest to act upon it? If this is the case, high performers distinguish themselves by taking steps to make sure they make the necessary changes/improvements that the criticism demands.
I’ve referred to Dr. Weisinger’s book often when helping clients deal with pressure. Dealing with criticism reduces the pressure and helps us become better leaders.
Enjoy your day. Enjoy the criticism.
